Category: Emotions

Questions

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How did it feel when I was finally arrested?
Did it bring you glee to know I was handcuffed and taken away?
Were you happy your long standing desire was finally fulfilled?
Were you satisfied with yourself?
Did you celebrate?
Did you pat yourself on the back triumphantly?
Did you rejoice knowing I was forced into the company of actual criminals?
Did it make you giddy to know I experienced the humiliation of being strip searched?
Were you finally satisfied to get the mother of your children arrested?
Was it all you hoped for?

Who does that?
Who plots plans premediates such things?
Who bates and berates?
Who starts a fire and fans the flames?
Who then pretends that they didn't create the inferno?
Who has no remorse?
Who shows love like that?
Who did I marry?
How soon can I be free?

-gws

Possibilities

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I fall in love multiple times a day
I am wooed by the beauty of the waking sky
The feel of hot water on my skin
The rich deep smell of brewing coffee
Enchanted with my children's laughter
A stranger's smile as we pass on the street
A friend's text message saying hello
Captivated by the crescent moon in a starry sky
A blazing sunset over a summer ocean
The fog spilling into the valley over the coastal mountains
There's so much to love if one chooses to look
So much to be delighted by
All it takes is a willingness to see the possibilities in the world

-gws




Better

I have been asked
If I thought I didn't deserve better
If I thought I couldn't have better
If I thought he was the best I could do
NO
I knew I deserved better
I knew I was worth better
I knew I could have better
I was in love
I believed my relationship 
Could become better
Would become better
I just had to wait and believe
I clung to breadcrumbs
While my soul starved
I believed in a dream
Long past its expiration date
I held onto hope
Even when the nightmares 
Haunted the wakeful day
I had to do everything I could
Until it became undeniably clear
There was nothing else I could do
When it was clear it was him and not me
I had shown up
Put the work in
Tried and cried and tired again
And he wouldn't meet me
He couldn't accept responsibility for his part
He wouldn't do the work
He wanted me to keep changing
Transforming
Making myself less so he could be more
Smaller
More compliant
Less of a person
More of a puppet
A Stepford Wife
That could never please him anyway
I knew that my luminescence was what drew him to me
My shine was acceptable then
My shine is acceptable now
Just not to him
I knew love shouldn't feel like this
Be like this
Behave like this
Hurt like this
Love does not bully
Love does not belittle
Love does not plot against the one it adores
Love does not manipulate or blame
Love does not destroy others to make itself feel powerful
My hope became my prison
An escape room I allowed to be created around me
I found myself trapped in its ever shifting walls
It would take time
It would take opportunity
It would take all the courage I had to leave
To choose me
And to not look back
I do deserve better
And reclaiming myself
Is where I start to create better

-gws
@wordswishesandwisdom

Happy NaPoWriMo! Here’s my Day 25 poem called Better #poetry #wordsmithing #poem #writer #wordswishesandwisdom #poet #poetsoftiktok #poetryTok #NaPoWriMo #NaPoWriMo2024 #poetryreading

♬ original sound – GWS

To Thine Own Self Be True

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This above all 
To thine own self be true
But damn
Is that a hard thing to do
I want to hold 
To my own principles
To set firm my jaw
And without a pause
Hold firm the ground
I'm planted upon
But when I say no
You refuse to move on
Turning my insides
Upside and down
Knitting my eyebrows
And causing a frown
Why is honoring me 
Such an ask
It's not like I'm begging
Some outrageous task
I'm asking for only
Mutual respect
Yet you recoil
As if you were decked 
Leaving me feeling
Like I've caused you harm
While my heart is rattling
My chest in alarm
Now I'm a monster
For making my needs
A priority which 
Leaves you aggrieved
One day soon 
I will disavow 
Ownership of 
What's forced on me now
I will figure out how
To my own self be true
And with peace in my heart
I will leave you

-gws


@wordswishesandwisdom

Happy NaPoWriMo! Here’s my Day 23 poem called To Thine Own Self Be True #poetry #wordsmithing #poem #writer #wordswishesandwisdom #poet #poetsoftiktok #poetryTok #NaPoWriMo #NaPoWriMo2024 #poetryreading

♬ original sound – GWS

Tell Your Story

Tell your story
Detail your plot twists
Describe how you penned your own ending
How you dreamt your next prolific chapter
You are proof that dragons can be slain
Villains can be outwitted
That the condemned can become the hero
Be the light that illuminates someone else’s
Pages through your inspiration
Show that soul their narrative can be altered
Show that soul their misery can become triumph
Because you have told them it can be done
Because you have shown them it was done

-gws