I sit in my silver armor upon my golden throne Light streams in through my temple's high windows Painting the floor below my dais in deep lavender beams The temple is quiet and familiar and mine
The doors to the chamber open and he enters Shadows trailing from his shoulders Like a cloak woven from smoke He strides forward Until he is stopped by the barrier of lavender light We lock eyes with each other He kneels upon the stones A gesture of only minor supplication For his eyes never leave mine
I close my eyes and breathe I feel the gauntlets release from my wrists The greaves from my legs The chest plate and chain mail The weight of them suddenly gone I open my eyes and watch as the armor becomes dark smoke Passing through the boundary Returning to him I do not need protection any longer The silver collar releases from my throat Then the silver circlet from my brow And last the silver band upon my finger The weight of him removed from me Cleansed and returned to his keeping
My eyes return to his Now he breathes deeply and black smoke flows from him As it passes through the lavender boundary The smoke becomes like liquid gold A delicate gold filigree pendent alights above my heart Glowing with a quietly fierce fire I can feel a gentle thrum as it syncs with my pulse Upon my head appears a grand and golden fiery crown Radiating strength and power Pulsing with each breath Now restored, these symbols of my power blaze to life Burning away every shadow in the temple Returning the quiet fire to my eyes
His shadows retreat as does his gaze He bows his head once This ritual of returning and release ended I watch as he rises, turns, and retreats He disappears back through the temple's doors They close silently behind him Tethered together no longer I sit in my power Whole again and free
"Love is not enough" This was a truth I gave you In place of a kiss goodbye Love is not enough to bridge The chasm separating us Neither is it flexible enough To withstand the tension It cannot rewrite our history Erase the years of pain It cannot alter reality Nor save our unsalvageable marriage The love between us is a shadow A wraith A remnant Of a hope dressed up to look like love In third-hand threadbare finery The illusion shattered And the real state of things exposed
Inelegant and rough hewn Invisible to all but me Oppressive and injurious This prison of grief and fear Holds me fast Arrested The key to joy held tight in my hand I wait for the guard to look away So I can fly free
I’m walking between worlds Both in a nightmare And waking from one Navigating the rocky path One footfall at a time Calling on my ancestors Those women who each Did the same in their own way As I step out of darkness Into the healing light of freedom
I see the grief in your eyes As the carefully crafted reality you made Starts to fracture into a cascade of spiderwebs The part of me that still loves you Wants to comfort you Tell you that everything will be ok But I cannot do that This disillusionment is necessary And being trapped inside your bell jar Has nearly ended me I will not forge you a new one with false hope That I am still your refuge Because this all must end You must face the world On the other side of the looking glass The real world where the damage you have wrought Lays exposed before you A cold world where you are finally alone My heart breaks because it didn't need to be this I wanted to love you I tried to But you didn't know how to accept love And you didn't know how to give love Because you don't know how to love yourself You don't know what healthy love feels like I feel the grief in my heart as I watch you Watch your world unravel I mourn for both of us For the future that will never be For the past so full of pain For the love we both deserved but That couldn't survive your demons I did love you I loved you so much, so hard I forgot how to love myself I grieve for all we are letting go of I grieve along side you As my hand slips from yours And we learn to say goodbye
I am not the author of your story As much as that saddens me to admit You are the wordsmith of your tale You write yourself as the hero of your own journey Despite being so often the villain of mine But understanding how you see your world Understanding that you can be none other Than the hero of your pages Helps me gain perspective into why You write me as the arch-villain of your narrative
There is no mirror in your story You cannot see yourself And as if bespelled You see only monsters and Enemies in every shadow My pages would describe the cause As a self-afflicted curse Yours would imply the question Are villains born or made? For you would say you are The result of what others made you Be you hero or villain You are forever alone Shadowboxing every perceived threat And drawing blood from everyone Who gets too close for too long Blinded by pain and unable to See that the one causing The most pain for you is you Like a manifested destiny It becomes so
As our books sit side by side on the shelf Yours a story of never ending rage, war, and loss Mine becomes a story of surrender, retreat, and release For I am removing myself from your story It is time to make myself the hero of my own And write the closing of this chapter For I can feel the peace and love I deserve Waiting for me in the next chapters of my life I am ready to transform my story Into the self-love story I have long deserved I hope you find your happy ending I write a magic wish for that Into my final paragraph Of our chapter in my book Then turn the page to my tabula rasa Full of potential and possibilities And the freedom to write my future As rich and joyful as I can imagine it
Say the thing
Make it awkward
For we never know when the final fickle Fate
Will wield her scissors and snip a thread from our tapestry
Forever severing a connection
An action that cannot be undone
"I love you."
"I miss you."
"I care about you."
"You are important to me."
"My life is better with you in it."
Whatever the thing is you feel
SAY IT
And let it go
Knowing that you have released love
In some version
Into the life of someone you care for in some way
We are fortunate to have our lives
Woven with many threads
But as gently as we are entangled together
The severing and unraveling are inevitable
Sharp and severe
We will have loss
But we do not have to have regret
Say the thing
Make it awkward
Only Clotho, Lachesis, and Atropos
See the grand weaving of our lives
How each chapter of our lives will unfold
And how and when those varied chapters will end
Within those pages we are gifted with the opportunity of choice
To give and receive love with the others in our story
Say the thing
Make it awkward
-gws
Words Wishes and Wisdom 