I sat in the flames as it all burned down
Trying to douse it with tears
But now I see things for what they are
And I step back to watch it burn
-gws
Burn
Category: Relationships
Learn to Say Goodbye
I see the grief in your eyes
As the carefully crafted reality you made
Starts to fracture into a cascade of spiderwebs
The part of me that still loves you
Wants to comfort you
Tell you that everything will be ok
But I cannot do that
This disillusionment is necessary
And being trapped inside your bell jar
Has nearly ended me
I will not forge you a new one with false hope
That I am still your refuge
Because this all must end
You must face the world
On the other side of the looking glass
The real world where the damage you have wrought
Lays exposed before you
A cold world where you are finally alone
My heart breaks because it didn't need to be this
I wanted to love you
I tried to
But you didn't know how to accept love
And you didn't know how to give love
Because you don't know how to love yourself
You don't know what healthy love feels like
I feel the grief in my heart as I watch you
Watch your world unravel
I mourn for both of us
For the future that will never be
For the past so full of pain
For the love we both deserved but
That couldn't survive your demons
I did love you
I loved you so much, so hard
I forgot how to love myself
I grieve for all we are letting go of
I grieve along side you
As my hand slips from yours
And we learn to say goodbye
-gws
Unintended Consequences
I tried to love you
In spite of yourself
I couldn’t know
That I’d forget
To love me
In the process
-gws
Wants and Needs
Everything's become about
Wants and needs
So much so
That we forgot
How to just
Be
-gws
No Longer Invested
I am no longer invested
In getting you to love me
The way that I need to be loved
I am no longer invested
In your opinions of me
I am no longer invested
In trying to meet you in the middle
I am no longer invested
In twisting myself into broken shapes to please you
When my only reward is pain
I am no longer invested
Because I have divested you
Of your access to my serenity
-gws
The Best Kind of Foreplay
Sit with me
Speak to me of
Philosophy
Art
Spirituality
Poetry
Sexuality
Share with me the
Beauty of your experience
The intricacies of your dreams
Tell me how lemons taste to you
Describe to me the complexity of scent and flavor
Of your whiskey
Invite my deepest curiosities
My darkest dreams and desires
To sit at your table
As you dine upon every thought
Savoring each exchange
Like a finely crafted meal
And I will do the same
Join me in unguarded honesty
Lose yourself in focused curiosity
Paint my soul with meaningful words
Excite me by challenging my beliefs
Without burning them in shame
Or drowning them in judgement
Stay here with me
Suspended in the silken web
We have woven between
Infinite synchronized heartbeats
We have crafted a spell from
Two souls orbiting each other
Do not let it end
Until the sun greets the world anew
Watch my lips as I speak
With your eyes burning with hunger
I will meet you on that threshold
Captivated by your mouth
As you share your inner self
In a verbal strip tease
I drop the last of my pretense
At your feet and wonder if you noticed
Now the little distance between us feels too far
I am all too aware of my body's pull toward yours
It feels inevitable and I know you feel it too
The spark of radiant connection that captures us
Words slow then stop
Only body language remains
Plump lips
Flushed skin
Fluttering lashes
Subtle smiles
Unbreakable eye contact
Goosebumps
And all from a conversation
The best kind of foreplay
-gws
Heroes and Villains
I am not the author of your story
As much as that saddens me to admit
You are the wordsmith of your tale
You write yourself as the hero of your own journey
Despite being so often the villain of mine
But understanding how you see your world
Understanding that you can be none other
Than the hero of your pages
Helps me gain perspective into why
You write me as the arch-villain of your narrative
There is no mirror in your story
You cannot see yourself
And as if bespelled
You see only monsters and
Enemies in every shadow
My pages would describe the cause
As a self-afflicted curse
Yours would imply the question
Are villains born or made?
For you would say you are
The result of what others made you
Be you hero or villain
You are forever alone
Shadowboxing every perceived threat
And drawing blood from everyone
Who gets too close for too long
Blinded by pain and unable to
See that the one causing
The most pain for you is you
Like a manifested destiny
It becomes so
As our books sit side by side on the shelf
Yours a story of never ending rage, war, and loss
Mine becomes a story of surrender, retreat, and release
For I am removing myself from your story
It is time to make myself the hero of my own
And write the closing of this chapter
For I can feel the peace and love I deserve
Waiting for me in the next chapters of my life
I am ready to transform my story
Into the self-love story I have long deserved
I hope you find your happy ending
I write a magic wish for that
Into my final paragraph
Of our chapter in my book
Then turn the page to my tabula rasa
Full of potential and possibilities
And the freedom to write my future
As rich and joyful as I can imagine it
-gws
Words Have Power
A rewrite of a 2015 poem
Words have power
They are thoughts made manifest
And loosed into the world
They are fragile crepe paper ghosts
Spoken softly to breathe thoughts to life
They are shining lights
Spoken with bold love and given as gifts
They are a clarion bell call
Spoken with volume, power, and purpose
They are truth and belief
And love made real
Words have power
They are thought made manifest
And loosed into the world
They are knife edges
Spoken to cut the soul
They are blunt force
Spoken to crush and wind
They are daggers
Spoken to pierce the heart
They are lashing whips
Spoken to welt and sting and scar
They are hurt and anger
And resentment made real
Words have power
They are thought made manifest
And loosed into the world
Beware how you manifest your
Intentions into the world
The heat of passionate anger
Can turn language into fists that leave bruises
That cannot be seen and may never heal
Beware how you manifest your
Intentions into the world
Regret is a bitter friend
For what is said cannot be unsaid or unheard
Beware how you manifest your
Intentions into the world
Think before you speak and
Hold your tongue until you possess
A calmer mind and kinder words
Words have power
They are thought made manifest
And loosed into the world
-gws
Mechanical Wings
He spoke to me of mechanical wings They appeared within a broken dream Born of fractured thoughts and roughened pieces And so these wings become his thesis Of chrome and shadow His masterpiece risen His body lay fallow Both betrayer and prison However he envisions that he flies As he dreams of untethered skies Let hope be the power to help him heal Born of pain transformed to magic and steel -gws
Say the Thing, Make it Awkward
Say the thing Make it awkward For we never know when the final fickle Fate Will wield her scissors and snip a thread from our tapestry Forever severing a connection An action that cannot be undone "I love you." "I miss you." "I care about you." "You are important to me." "My life is better with you in it." Whatever the thing is you feel SAY IT And let it go Knowing that you have released love In some version Into the life of someone you care for in some way We are fortunate to have our lives Woven with many threads But as gently as we are entangled together The severing and unraveling are inevitable Sharp and severe We will have loss But we do not have to have regret Say the thing Make it awkward Only Clotho, Lachesis, and Atropos See the grand weaving of our lives How each chapter of our lives will unfold And how and when those varied chapters will end Within those pages we are gifted with the opportunity of choice To give and receive love with the others in our story Say the thing Make it awkward -gws
