Category: Healing

Tabula Rasa

My future is tabula rasa
Full of possibilities

Slow to emerge from the long shadows 
And still brushing off the cobwebs of shame, doubt, and fear
I begin to wonder what awaits me
Who awaits me

The question nauseates me
I'm not ready to open my heart
Nor do I expect to be ready any time soon
And yet I find myself wondering 
Will there be another 
My heart fearfully whispering,
"Will I get a second chance?"

I'm not ready to fall in love again
I am only longing for the magic of falling
The elation that comes from feeling seen
Feeling chosen
Because all I wanted for so long 
Was to feel chosen
To be enough

I am working to remember how to love me
How to be enough for myself
How to appreciate my perfect imperfections
How to forgive the choices I made to survive
I must become reacquainted with me

My future is tabula rasa
Full of possibilities
Bursting with opportunity to craft a life I want to live
And blessed with time to heal from a life I endured
I embrace my next chapter gratefully
Even as my knees quake with each step forward

My blank slate has its first word: freedom
Its second word: peace
I think that's a beautiful place for a new story to start

-gws

The Luxury of Familiarity

I am no longer funding 
The luxury of familiarity

It has cost me too much
And offered questionable ROI

I am only entertaining thoughtful investment
In quality platonic companionship

For those interested in applying
Limited applications are being accepted

A nonrefundable fee will be assessed
And a thorough background check performed

I reserve the right to cancel the requisition at any time
And invest in my own peace instead

-gws

Ritual

I have coated my boundaries in sacred salt
Saged the walls of my mind
Served healing teas to my soul 
Soaked my dreams in moon water 
Calmed my spirits with lavender sachets 

I have removed the “welcome” mat from my doorstep 
Hung a horseshoe above my threshold 
Covered my aura in layers of steel 
Cut the cord with silver shears
All to reclaim myself from you 

-gws

Remember How It Was Before

Remember how it was before
When I confidently walked through my life 
Believing in a future full of infinite possibilities
Idealistic and self-possessed
Inspired and free to manifest the life I desired
Never apologizing for the joyousness of my nature
Never apologizing for my independence and adventurousness
Never apologizing

Such a contrast with who I would embody for too long
Cowed and questing to find the right key
That would unlock your love for the me I was before
The me that I thought you cherished
The me that was once upon a time enough
I remember how it was before
I am on a journey back to myself
The version of me that resembles the echos of my unscarred self
Together we will offer an apology to the me that was before
A reclamation of what I thought was lost
And I will be a wonder again

-gws