Foothills

Springtime in the Bay Area makes me think that the emerald city could be nestled in the foothills

-gws

Slay

These poems are a journey 
That began in the light of hope and love
Then slowly meandered through increasing darkness 
They dare to expose the skeletons and demons 
Barely hidden behind my front door for too long
The narration begins in the middle 
After darkness had well fallen
And documents my struggle to breathe
My desperate journey to find myself again 

And for those who live with horrors who wear human faces
If I found my way free
I know you can too
Let these poems serve as proof 
That though it is not easy
Freedom can be won
You can take your life back 
Write the story exactly as YOU wish it to be

Sometimes the dragon burns down the world 
As long as you’re standing 
No matter how wounded
You can slay that dragon
You ARE the hero of your story
YOU get to say when the story is over
YOU get to decide how the new book starts
YOU get to do whatever the hell YOU want
Take my story and forge it into your sword of courage 
SLAY

-gws

Wanderer

The wanderer in me craves to shoot our arrow at the stars and let them drag us away from the responsibilities and hardships of our mundane life toward the horizon of dreams and the freedom of possibilities 

-gws

We All Might Just Be Alright

I fucking hate homework 
And projects 
And assemblies
And parent-teacher conferences
It’s a gauntlet of pushing and pulling 
Begging and beguiling 
Praying and pleading 
I have to pretend I know what I’m doing 
Convince teachers I’m a capable parent 
When I feel like the absolute worst 
I’ve used all the gas in my emotional tank
Before my children walk back in the door 
“What’s for dinner, Mom?”
“I ripped my pants, Mom.”
“I have a field trip, Mom.”
“I have a project due on Monday, Mom.”
There are more moments than I am proud of
Where I mourn my party of one days
Then one of my sons says
“I love you, Mama.”
Points to my chest and asks
“Are you ok in there, Mama?”
Takes my phone and tucks me in and says
“You’re sick, Mama.  You need to rest.”
I start feeling like less of a fuck up
Like I might be getting something right
Like we all might just be alright 

-gws

Spring Awakening

Seasons are changing 
I’m surprised to find myself In
In a spring awakening 
Possibilities bloom
While dreams grow deep roots
-gws

Ode to Audiobooks

In the days of old
Storytellers traveled far and wide 
Plying their trade at hearth and square 
Sharing tales true and mythical 
Of heroes and villains 
Triumph and tragedy 
Honing the sharpness of their wordplay 
Weaving captivating tales for coin
Where are the bards of today 
Spinning tales for the eager 

I host a phantasmagoria of storytellers 
Tucked neatly into my pocket 
Poised to share hours of narration
For an audience of one
A tap a screen whisks me away 
Into a plethora of elaborate worlds
Thousands of hours of storycraft 
Read by hosts of skilled modern bards
Memoirs and poetry
Worlds fictional and factual 
Could the traveling rhapsodist
In their pre-modern world
Dare dream of such wonders
As the miraculous audiobook 

-gws

I Hope the World Is Kind

To any who my words reach
In a time and place I will never see
I hope the world is kind
And if such things as kindness
Still prove fleeting
I charge you with performing
Defiant acts of kindness
That your efforts might fall 
Like seeds upon fallow fields
And grow like wildflowers
In the hearts of those you touch

-gws

American Bison

American Bison are commonly known as the American Buffalo
And are the national mammal of the United States
These grand beasts have evolved to adapt to the harsh North American Great Plains winters
They have vast biological adaptations to allow them to thrive in the volatile environment 
They evolved physically optimized to survive
Yet their most fascinating adaptation is behavioral
Unlike nearly every other wild and domestic creature 
Buffalo do not flee from the sweeping brutal storms that cross the landscape
They put down their massive heads and turn into the maelstrom
They meet the fury and ferocity eye to eye
They seem to inherently understand 
The only way out is through
Resisting the sky is futile
The sooner the storm is met
The less time it has to intensify
The sooner they can emerge from its dangers
No wonder indigenous people hold them sacred
To meet the fury of nature unflinchingly
Steadfast and secure in the innate knowing
Passed down through generations
That buffalo are built to endure 
Creating their own harmony with their world
Writing their own survival rules
Wise teachers for us all

-gws

Dysregulation

Unnatural sense of panic
Fight or flight barely held at bay
Dysregulation finds a new pattern
Breathe - Breathe - Breathe it away

-gws

When Love Returns to Darken Your Doorstep

Oh it's you
I knew you might find me again one day
Minding my business
Unaware and defenseless
I knew you might show up on my doorstep
Inviting the resurrection of my long disused heart
I thought we had an agreement
An understanding, perhaps
You see, I have no desire to let you settle here again
The soil in which I am planted is not good for your roots
You salted it well long ago
Do you really not remember because I still do
And yet here you are
Bags in hand asking if you can stay a while
Looking at me with familiar enticement
Dressed up in pheromones and endorphins
With all the charisma of a red carpet return
I have not forgotten how fickle you are
How you overstayed your welcome
How you left me heartbroken 
I don't trust you
You're too good at feeling good
I forget too easily how you are besties with misery
Stop looking at me with eyes that want to know me
Stop looking at me with eyes that want
Stop attempting to pull me into your gravity
I do not trust I can break free again
I don't want to have to break free again
Don't you understand you are not safe for me
Don't you understand I need to feel safe
I do not trust myself in your presence
I am scared, you see
You see, I am scarred
So very scared
So very scarred
The last time I let you stay
Nearly dismantled me
So no
Do not leave one speck of dirt on my doormat
I beg you to to forget where I live
I do not want your false promises 
I do not want you to be seen by you
Your attention has cost me too much
And I'm still in debt for it

-gws