I smoked a joint with the moon She insisted it would allow us to see the world's beauty better As herbal clouds drifted lazily across her round face She rambled dreamily about the midnight sea's endless dance with her voluptuous celestial body Spoke stanzas of star songs Sang of wild wolf hunts and their howling choruses Described forest galleries full of freshly woven spider webs bejeweled with moon-dazzled dew She waxed lyrical about the endless stream of hopes and prayers whispered to her Giggled as she fondly recounted the numerous myths humans had crafted about her I listened contentedly Basking in her hazy light My heavy-lidded eyes glistening half moons themselves Safely ensconced in her keeping
Inside her dreaming, I see her Hurting Lost Grieving Bags beneath her eyes from haunted or missing sleep Furrowed brows from innumerable worries Her will shaken and unsure I know her well for she is me Me ensconced in endings and beginnings Me inelegantly navigating transition
The magic of dreaming grants me this opportunity I approach her My hair more silvered My face more textured My heart glowing warm with a joy for living That felt so unreachable then
"Hello," I say
She composes herself and silently greets me in return
"I hope you don't mind, you look like you could use a friend."
She inhales unsteadily and motions for me to sit We look out at the passing world Quiet for an indistinguishable amount of time
"It will not always feel this way," I say
I take her hand in mine She does not resist
"Do you remember when your children were babies?"
She nods slowly Eyes unfocused as she touches the memories
"Do you remember the nights that felt so long? The marathon of survival that was three babies under three?"
She nods again with a slight smile Alighting at the corner of her lips as she remembers
"It felt like forever until you one day realized You could sleep through the night. You could establish routines. You could start making time for yourself In bigger and bigger doses."
She exhales Her shoulders lowering a bit
"This journey is just like that one. Unpredictable and exhausting. Endless in the moment. Overwhelming."
She looks at her hand in mine and nods I wrap my other around our clasped hands
"This will not last forever. You will find your way off your knees As the weight of this slowly lifts from you. You will relinquish your worry. Your grief will fade to make room for joy. You will learn to trust yourself again. You will learn to trust others again. Do not get too lost in your sadness. Navigate moments of laughter and lightness Like stepping stones amongst the mud. Let them light up your eyes and relax your shoulders. Let them propel you through your days Until you are no longer keeping track of days. Just like those early times in motherhood You will awaken to find yourself on the other side. Changed. Renewed. Rebuilt. Ready to welcome joy and love and freedom willingly. The fog and pain will clear as passing storms do. This I can promise you."
She looks up into my face Eyes searching mine as I smile and squeeze her hand I watch as a tiny light returns to her tear-filled eyes
"How do you know?" she whispers
I pull her hand to my heart.
"Because I have seen you do it. I have witnessed you rise from these ashes. I know how powerful and radiant you will emerge."
As dreams do when truth is revealed The edges of this world begin to dissolve like chalk in rain The light of recognition begins to glow in her eyes As I release her hand and stand I step in amongst the other passersby of her dreamscape My message conveyed My job done A voice from her future left to linger in her dreaming Placing a north star in the sky of her darkest night
Lightning bugs Fairy wings Eyelash wishes Magical things Puffy clouds up in the sky Shifting dreams just passing by Daydreams spinning round young heads Sweet dream wishes for their beds Storyteller's well worn seat Children sitting at their feet Wonderment in every eye Silent tears for sad goodbyes Weave for them a strange new world And embed it in the heart of a girl Or a boy who's heart still dreams Of mythic heroes or vicious fiends In the core of every child Lives possibility fresh and wild A precious gift within each heart Inspirations from which grows art
I sit in my silver armor upon my golden throne Light streams in through my temple's high windows Painting the floor below my dais in deep lavender beams The temple is quiet and familiar and mine
The doors to the chamber open and he enters Shadows trailing from his shoulders Like a cloak woven from smoke He strides forward Until he is stopped by the barrier of lavender light We lock eyes with each other He kneels upon the stones A gesture of only minor supplication For his eyes never leave mine
I close my eyes and breathe I feel the gauntlets release from my wrists The greaves from my legs The chest plate and chain mail The weight of them suddenly gone I open my eyes and watch as the armor becomes dark smoke Passing through the boundary Returning to him I do not need protection any longer The silver collar releases from my throat Then the silver circlet from my brow And last the silver band upon my finger The weight of him removed from me Cleansed and returned to his keeping
My eyes return to his Now he breathes deeply and black smoke flows from him As it passes through the lavender boundary The smoke becomes like liquid gold A delicate gold filigree pendent alights above my heart Glowing with a quietly fierce fire I can feel a gentle thrum as it syncs with my pulse Upon my head appears a grand and golden fiery crown Radiating strength and power Pulsing with each breath Now restored, these symbols of my power blaze to life Burning away every shadow in the temple Returning the quiet fire to my eyes
His shadows retreat as does his gaze He bows his head once This ritual of returning and release ended I watch as he rises, turns, and retreats He disappears back through the temple's doors They close silently behind him Tethered together no longer I sit in my power Whole again and free
Holding hands in matching rockers Laughing about when we were young You reminiscing about record stores and ska shows As I tell our grandchildren tales of magic Spending our sunset days in loving conversations Each other's best bestie Strolling into the ever after that follows the happily
Tell no one your deepest dreams Those valuable things That manifest in the heart's nebula The burning factory of creation Tucked securely in your soul They are precious treasures Composed of ether and moonlight Not fit for just anyone's consumption
Sometimes when I lay down my head All tucked up tight upon my bed I drift and float and start to dream Cascades of words just like a stream I wonder at this gift of mine Delighted I can dream in rhyme No two dreams are quite the same My poet's mind did birth this game Though rhyming dreams are often fun It's time to call this poem done.
Do not pull me from this place too soon This place between waking and dreaming You see The moon is singing A song meant only for me She sings of hope and wonder I must stay here and hear her Just a while longer Embraced by her soft silver light Her welcoming night Full of mystery Legacy Lunacy Soon she will set the stars to ringing A cacophonous celestial pealing Then I know our evening Is at its ending That soon I must be leaving This glorious realm Between waking and dreaming Where I dance with the singing moon Please Do not wake me too soon
Words Wishes and Wisdom 