I see you watching The sway of my hips The set of my lips The unapologetic way I take up space You're wondering about me Imagining my mysteries Gauging if you are worthy To kneel in worship before My dark goddess displayed Exhalant in my glory I will take no audience With ordinary souls They do not ignite curiosity in me I like those who recognize Their audacity in approaching me Because my eyes show I give no fucks I do not play If I let you in Doesn't mean you get to stay I have danced with devils And cast them all out Barely a glance spared them I see you watching me What's your move
Crave deep and honest conversation Sit with her Like a blind man tracing her face Run your curiosities With careful deliberateness Across her mind And allow her to do the same Lean into the exchange And let the world fall away Spend the night in philosophical repose So you may greet the dawn With your souls on fire Make evenings like this a ritual This will light a fire in her blood This is how to woo a poet
I sit in my silver armor upon my golden throne Light streams in through my temple's high windows Painting the floor below my dais in deep lavender beams The temple is quiet and familiar and mine
The doors to the chamber open and he enters Shadows trailing from his shoulders Like a cloak woven from smoke He strides forward Until he is stopped by the barrier of lavender light We lock eyes with each other He kneels upon the stones A gesture of only minor supplication For his eyes never leave mine
I close my eyes and breathe I feel the gauntlets release from my wrists The greaves from my legs The chest plate and chain mail The weight of them suddenly gone I open my eyes and watch as the armor becomes dark smoke Passing through the boundary Returning to him I do not need protection any longer The silver collar releases from my throat Then the silver circlet from my brow And last the silver band upon my finger The weight of him removed from me Cleansed and returned to his keeping
My eyes return to his Now he breathes deeply and black smoke flows from him As it passes through the lavender boundary The smoke becomes like liquid gold A delicate gold filigree pendent alights above my heart Glowing with a quietly fierce fire I can feel a gentle thrum as it syncs with my pulse Upon my head appears a grand and golden fiery crown Radiating strength and power Pulsing with each breath Now restored, these symbols of my power blaze to life Burning away every shadow in the temple Returning the quiet fire to my eyes
His shadows retreat as does his gaze He bows his head once This ritual of returning and release ended I watch as he rises, turns, and retreats He disappears back through the temple's doors They close silently behind him Tethered together no longer I sit in my power Whole again and free
She is a poet An enigmatic storyteller A word-painter who colors outside the lines Who sometimes rhymes Language her artistic medium Manifesting nouns and verbs Seeking nuanced shades in adjectives and adverbs Crafting simile and metaphor Manipulating personification and hyperbole Until a shape evolves This scaffolding for allegory to be called a poem A golem built from meticulously chosen words Watercolor emotions Empathetic evocations The work imbued with the DNA of her life experience Powered by hope for her audience to feel at a visceral level A fraction of the tsunami that lives in her
The Universe intervened In our amber-trapped lives Cleaving us asunder Now that your umbra is clearing I begin to see the Universe has Gifted me infinite sunrises Bursting with innumerable possibilities After half my life with you Standing you up Holding you up I find myself suddenly free Of the responsibility of you I delight in the joy of doing anything Without your judgment I relax remembering that there are no Relentless expectations to navigate I revel in a full night's uninterrupted sleep I relinquish more and more tension from my body As each day passes without you A single divine gift containing All the possibilities I can dream of I will not get over you in a day You have left me a moonscape Desolate and damaged I will redeem and reclaim myself Both shadow and light Ever shifting and changing Just like the magnificent moon
I exist in a liminal state A being And not a being
Grief ebbs and flows in king tides Emptying me Submerging me Stealing away my breath With its pressure changes Feelings grow in question marks Within my hollow chest Proliferating like fungus in the fall Inside of my being that is not a being
Emptiness overflowing with nothingness Destruction and restoration Warring to fill the immeasurable void Shaped like my cremated heart Pulsing with unfathomable aching Testing the tolerances of My being that is not a being
It is surreal to be and not be To experience the reality of the question Posed by Master Shakespeare In rhyme and sonnet so long ago To understand that one can be both A being and not a being
I may appear whole What you cannot see Are the burns on my feet From walking miles through fire The stars in my eyes From taking too many hits The lacerations on my skin From navigating uncountable shards of glass The weariness deep in my bones From rising everyday to overcome Some challenge or trial Again And again I have dodged and weaved Punched and parried my way Through days I never could have predicted I have shown up when all I desired Was to lay down and give up Because if not me, then who Mothers have to dig deep We have to find that reservoir of power labeled Do it for the children So I push So I push So I push Through the deepest, coldest waters The fiercest, raging fires The longest, darkest nights because If not me, then who For them
What is this nightmare? Acne Joint pain Mood swings Hot flashes Night sweats Insomnia It's a good thing that men do not experience The joys of menopause I'm pretty sure that we would have Destroyed ourselves long ago if they did Because this experience is madness It's like the upgrade to puberty no one wanted I HAVE SO MUCH RAGE This has to be the reason women stop Putting up with intolerable things during midlife Because I'm ready to take a machete to all of the bullshit I have zero patience for anything When my hormones tumble out of wack All stupidity enrages me And so many things are branded with A blinking neon sign that reads STUPIDEST THING EVER DO NOT TOLERATE Now don't get it twisted, gentle listeners There are no excuses planted here Do not dismiss my disgruntled reactions As merely hormonal storm surges These hormones are the reason I can see The bullshit so clearly They are the reason I will not abide the bullshit One second longer
As I once let go of the Maiden's mantel to take up the Mother's mantel I now start letting go of my Mother's mantel To assume the mantel of the Crone Her knowing look Her sharp witted smirk She has seen it and rejected it all She understands that societal norms The expectations that sit like weights Upon her back are not hers to carry She understands that she is a force She stops caring what others think of her And starts caring about what she thinks of herself I feel these changes calling to my core Calling the taproot of my soul to descend Into the tides ruled by my will and Grace's wisdom Tides that my ancestors waded in And tapped into before me The wise women The grandmothers The healers and midwives The matriarchs I am about to inherit their legacy
But first I must walk this gauntlet called menopause This thrill ride is only just beginning And I already want off If you meet me and see a feral glint in my eye Or sweat on my brow Know it's best to just walk on by My grasp on my self-control Is not a secure one I run on resentments and judgment Not tightly moored to my higher self This base self more worldly Guiding me through this transition Steeped in ragged ugly truth So that when I emerge My crown of silver Is earned
Words Wishes and Wisdom 